Did I ever tell you about the time
It must have been around the neighbourhood of '99
When an Amtrak ticket and a magazines impression took me west
until the end of the line

I got my headshot and a job stacking shelves
I got an agent just like everyone else
And if I left someone behind, well it must have slipped my mind
while I was busy looking out for myself

The saddest part of all of this
The hardest part for me to admit is that when I'm looking back on it

Those were the happiest days of my life
The happiest days of my life
The happiest days of my life
And if that sounds shallow, hell I'd rather just be shallow again

And if I stumbled going over my lines
The director that I met didn't mind
He let me read for the lead in a soda pop commercial
Screw the acting, boy those pecs are divine

The saddest part of all of this
The hardest part for me to admit is that when I'm looking back on it

Those were the happiest days of my life
The happiest days of my life
The happiest days of my life
And if that sounds shallow, hell I'd rather just be shallow
'cause I met a model on the set
She let me get my fingers wet
I felt I was a king upon amphetamine and silicon
With summer coming to an end
I new my days were numbered when
She said she'd tired of acting dumb
And asked what I was running from

Those were the happiest days of my life
The happiest days of my life
The happiest days of my life
And if that sounds shallow, hell I'd rather just be shallow
'cause there's something 'bout reality I find hard to swallow
And what kind of bastard leaves his three-year-old daughter in New England?